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Our Challenging Times…Three Things We Can All Do

Regardless of whether you’re on the political left or right, or right down the middle as an independent, we can probably all agree that our country is facing challenging times. In talking to folks, although the above is the consensus, it’s typically followed up with:

  • “There’s nothing I can do” (or)
  • “What can I do about it?”

As indicated in previous posts, I’d suggest taking that question to prayer, like we should all things, asking God to speak into our challenges and our lives. That said, there are three things that all of us as Christians can and should do, assuming we want to make a positive impact on those around us and the broader society…yes our country.

Those three things are indicated in the:

  • Great Commandments – Mark 12: 30-31 or Matthew 22:37-39
    1. “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength”.
    2. “The second is this: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. There is no other commandment greater than these.”
  • Great Commission – Matthew 28:19-20
    1. “Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, until the end of the age.

I heard a Priest once say that hardly anyone confesses sinning against the First Commandment, which is “I am the Lord your God: you shall not have strange Gods before me”. The fact is that in abiding by this Commandment, including how it is stated in the positive above (“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength”), the other 9 Commandments are much less an issue. I don’t say this because they’re not important. I say it because if we truly love God and do so before all else, the degree to which we sin is far less.

In abiding by the first part of the Great Commandments, we’re happier and healthier, helping those around us to be the same.

Many of us know the Golden Rule as “do unto others as you would have them do unto you”. Jesus tells us this in Matthew 7:12. Stated in the positive, as Jesus expressed in the Great Commandments, we are to love our neighbors as we love ourselves. What kind of world would we live in if this were always first and foremost in our minds?

The Great Commission speaks to our call, not a mere suggestion by Jesus, to share the love of Christ, to share our faith with others. Jesus makes the point that He’ll be with us every step along the way.

So many in our society, as evidenced by the dramatic decline in practicing Christians (including Catholics), don’t know the love of Christ. Statistically we’ve gone from 75% claiming themselves as being Christian in the 80s and 90s to just 50% today.

What would happen if we could change the above trend? Think about it. Think about the impact it would have. In summary, love God, love others, and share our faith. What would our country look like if we all did a lot more of that?

The next time you think “there’s nothing I can do” (or) “what can I do about it?”, do the above. Again…Love God. Love others. Share our faith.

As always, please contact me with comments, questions, concerns, challenges, or prayer requests at Mark@MarkJosephMinistries.com.

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Remember….God made you for GREATNESS!!!

 

Mark Joseph

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Weekly Blog

Most of Us Believe that We Have to Earn Love

Not easy to understand, nor admit for many, virtually all of us believe that we have to earn the love of others. Manifesting itself in many ways (topics for other blogs), the question becomes, how did this happen? What during our development created this in us? Read on. You may be surprised.

Think Back to Your Childhood

Think back to your childhood. If it was like mine, when you behaved or performed well, you received praise and basked in the excitement of your parents, family members, teachers, coaches, and friends. If you misbehaved or performed badly, it’s likely the reactions were much less pleasant. Perhaps you were scolded or corrected. Even harder, perhaps you felt ignored or set aside while others basked in the glory.

Most of us knew growing up that our parents loved us no matter what. But that didn’t change the fact that we wanted them to respond to us with praise, excitement, and pride, and it hurt when they didn’t.

For me, it started when I was young. I struggled academically, reading on a second-grade level in the fifth grade. I was tutored in reading for many years. My brother, one year younger, was/is very bright. My parents used to joke that he talked before he walked. He got all the praise and attention for his performance in the classroom. I didn’t.

The opposite and more positive occurred for me as well. Playing an impactful role on a championship football team my senior year of high school, I felt incredibly loved, with my personal and our team success celebrated by many.

How It Gets Reinforced

For most of us, the deep-seated belief that love is conditional or “earned” gets reinforced at a young age based on how we perform, whether we succeed or fail. The way people respond to us plays a big role in determining our self-worth. When we do well and our success is celebrated, we feel loved. When we fall short and are possibly criticized, we don’t feel loved or accepted. All of this contributes to our belief that we have to “earn” love.

It’s important to note that not all criticism is bad — in fact, constructive criticism can be incredibly life-giving when done right. Sometimes failure brings on destructive criticism though, which is never helpful or good, especially if it is derogatory towards the recipient. And although there are times when things are better left unsaid, silence as a response to our failure or poor performance can really hurt. Young people especially sense disappointment, and it’s often made even worse when nothing is said.

You Feel You Need to Prove Yourself

Regardless of the details of your particular experience, chances are you feel a need to prove yourself on some level. Almost all of us believe that we have to earn love, that it isn’t given unconditionally. We learn this from a young age and we take this belief into our adult lives. Striving to be loved, to be accepted, we learn to chase success, which everyone defines in a different way. Achieving success, regardless of the endeavor, makes us feel loved, accepted, and respected. We feel important and validated. And because we like those feelings, we keep pursuing more success.

Success Isn’t a Bad Thing

I’m not arguing that success is a bad thing, but I would suggest that understanding our drive for it is important. The purpose of Mark Joseph Ministries is to share with people how to go from being overwhelmed to fulfilled and further to determine how they (you) are MADE FOR GREATNESS!!! Believe it or not, that journey begins with you understanding that you are a person worthy of love precisely because you exist, not based on what you achieve. Although you’ve been conditioned for it, you don’t need to “earn” love.  

Please share any comments with me at Mark@MarkJosephMinistries.com.

May God Bless you on your journey to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Mark Joseph

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Weekly Blog

Courage is Easy to See….If You Pay Attention

If you’re like me, when you think of courage, the images that come to mind include soldiers going into battle, a police officer rescuing a hostage, firemen pulling people from a burning building, or someone saving a victim from an attacker. These examples and similar ones are what get all of the press coverage. In those stories, whether identifying with the victim or the “hero”, we get a glimpse of “courage”.

Examples of Courage in Everyday Life

The truth is that we have examples of courage all around us, that are far less dramatic than the above. The story I want to share here is very close to home, relating to my wife’s father, who not only showed great courage, but dignity.

When I met Rodney, my father-in-law, then in his 70s, he was still cutting hair in his barber shop of 50+ years, managed his rental properties, golfed and bowled regularly, hunted, raised cows, took care of his 15-acre country property, and spent tons of time with his best friend (my mother-in-law), his daughter (my wife), and the broader family. Rodney was a friend’s friend. Everyone knew him and everyone loved him. 

Lou Gehrig’s Disease

Having experienced tragedy previously in his life, including being thrown from a speeding car as a teenager, breaking his back, and being the lone survivor, Rodney was diagnosed with ALS, more commonly known as Lou Gehrig’s Disease. For those not familiar, ALS, or amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, is a progressive neurodegenerative disease that affects nerve cells in the brain and the spinal cord. Early symptoms of ALS include:

  • Tripping and falling
  • Weakness in the hands, legs, feet, or ankles
  • Slurred speech or trouble swallowing
  • Muscle cramps and twitching 

As the disease advances and nerve cells are destroyed, the muscles progressively weaken. This eventually affects overall mobility, chewing, swallowing, speaking, and breathing. With no cure, life expectancy is typically no more than 5 years after diagnosis.

Never Complaining

So as to prolong his retirement, he used rubber bands to help him hold the clippers in his hand while cutting hair. He eventually had to stop working, which was preceded by no longer hunting, golfing, or bowling. He went from a cane to a walker, followed by a scooter and then a powered wheelchair. Over time, he couldn’t do anything for himself. He went from living a healthy, active, vibrant life to realizing that he was dying a slow death.  

From the very beginning of this chapter in his life, Rodney never complained. Never. Not only did he never complain, but he took on every new endeavor (and there were many) without hesitation. From giving up work and all his hobbies, to no longer driving, to being in a wheelchair, and ultimately having his every need taken care of, he did it all with what I view as absolute courage.

No Fear

According to Dictionary.com, courage is the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, or pain without fear. I saw in Rodney a courage that was quiet and calm. He encountered great difficulty, but never feared it. Although ALS patients don’t experience physical pain, the emotional stress is a big issue, but not ever as expressed by Rodney.

He never feared the next thing. He never feared death. In fact, he embraced the journey, showing all of us what a life of courage looks like.

Path to Peace

My father-in-law, ever so courageous and dignified (in a world that so needs it), lived at a place of surrender to God’s will, ever so grateful for the life he lived. He was an incredibly humble man, one who loved all who he encountered. I define these four things as the path to peace. While suffering from the disease that ultimately took his life, he did a wonderful job of exemplifying each. 

Who are the courageous people in your life, not the ones who perform external heroic acts (which shouldn’t be minimized), but live lives with courage, dignity, and faith? I bet you have them. I assure you that you can learn from them.

Please send me your comments at Mark@MarkJosephMinistries.com.

May God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!! 

Mark Joseph

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Weekly Blog

What Are You Afraid Of?

We all have fears. What are yours’? Have you ever thought about the source of your fears? Or what they’ve prevented you from doing?

I experienced fear for a long time. It was a constant for me, negatively impacting my daily life, my work, my relationships, and even my health, both physically and emotionally.

Living in fear impedes progress in our lives. It stops us from trying new things or taking healthy risks. Self-development requires us to stretch ourselves, to go outside of our comfort zones. It requires risk. We can’t improve the way we’re called to, we can’t grow, we can’t live truly fulfilling lives if we are always in a state of fear.

I’ve learned that if we can name our fears honestly, we can at least begin to overcome them. Here is a list of some of the most common causes of fear. Which seem most applicable to you in your life right now?

Rejection: Everyone wants to belong, to feel loved and accepted. Nobody wants to be rejected.  It is very unhealthy when we value ourselves only through the acknowledgement and acceptance of others. This fear leads us to conform to the way we think others want us to behave, rather than sticking to what we know to be right.

Ridicule: No one wants to be criticized, much less made fun of or laughed at. People want to be respected and acknowledged for what they do and who they are. Ridicule makes us feel stripped of our dignity. Obsessive fear of ridicule can cause us to turn inward, isolate ourselves, and refuse to try new things.

Confrontation: Very few people enjoy confrontation with others, but some are so crippled by the fear of it that they never confront issues. This can lead to a lot of misery, broken relationships, and lost opportunities, because real problems that could be worked through if talked about are never addressed.

Loneliness: Although there are many who have no problem with “alone time,” no one wants to be alone all the time. We’re not built to go through life alone. The fear that no one will love us or stand by us is a very real one for many, and it can be very isolating. It can also keep us from being true to ourselves (our beliefs, values, and desires) because we don’t want to lose the people in our lives.

The unknown: Most people love a certain level of predictability. While we like some excitement in our lives, we resist change. Fear of the unknown relates to loss of control, things becoming unpredictable, and change itself. We fear it because we don’t know what to expect, and we don’t understand how it will impact us. Fearing the unknown keeps us from going out of our comfort zones to become all we’re meant to be.

Failure: No one likes to fail because of what we think failure says about us, i.e. that we’re not good enough or not talented enough. Fear of failure causes us to shut down, to refuse to risk because we don’t want to go through the embarrassment of failing or feeling like we’ve let other people down.  

I would suggest that failure is the thing most of us fear above all else. Why are we afraid to fail?

I think we fear failure because we fear what others will think of us if we fail. We fear that if we aren’t successful in their eyes, then they won’t love us. Diving even more deeply, we fear that if we fail, it proves that we aren’t worth loving at all. This fear keeps us from trying new things, from discovering joy in unexpected places, and from becoming our best selves.

How have you conquered your fears? Let us know your thought at Mark@MarkJosephMinistries.com.

God Bless you on your journey to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Mark Joseph