Tag: faith

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The Gift of Our Faith

Do you ever wonder what you’d do without your faith? How you’d experience life? It’s hard to imagine. Having Jesus Christ as my lens through which to see the world is an extreme comfort. After all, we know the end of the story…as they say. We know who wins. 

As I referenced two weeks ago, life can and does get tough. We are presented with many challenges. Some are far reaching and although may not have an immediate personal impact, can create worry nonetheless. Others are very personal and close to home. 

Related to the latter, this COVID thing is crazy. It hits different people in various ways. I have a friend, Ben, who’s been in the hospital with it since June 17th, first on a ventilator and getting dialysis. We would get updates from his wife, Mariely, regularly and for a while they weren’t good. He was in real danger. By the time this blog posts, he will hopefully have had the trach tube removed and is now able to talk. 

I visited Ben recently and he looked amazing, really amazing, especially given what he’s gone through. We prayed together and received Communion from a visiting Deacon. Ben is wearing a scapular and has a Rosary ring. There’s a large picture of Our Lady of Guadalupe on the windowsill. Given the great devotion they have to our Virgin Mother, Mariely was sharing with me the Marian Feasts that take place during August, each one marking a new milestone in Ben’s recovery. Mariely also shared the soothing impact it has on Ben when she prays the Rosary daily, along with the Divine Mercy Chaplet.  

Because of COVID, I had stopped going to daily Mass and was dragging my feet going back. It was Ben insisting that I do so, that got me to go again…never missing. I work with Ben. I love asking him to pray before our meetings, where he always reverently invokes our Lady. Ben is one of the holiest, kindest, conscientious, most compassionate (and btw smartest), men I know and I’m not just saying that because he’s been sick. He deeply loves our Lord, along with his wife and kids. His faith is a part of him. You can hear it in his voice and see it in his actions.  

 

Be Not Afraid

I was on a call this past week, where the person I was talking to said, “be not afraid”, making reference to our faith. I reminded him that it says some derivative of that, 365 times in Scripture. Ben has no fear because he has faith. It was such a joy being with Ben and Mariely, whose faith is so strong. What an example they are. 

Here’s the deal. We are going to have challenges in life…big struggles, even tragedies. They’re going to occur whether we’re in relationship with Jesus or not. Here’s what I know, having done it both ways. Life is always better with God in it. Our faith really matters. It changes everything, including eliminating the fear. It’s a gift. It’s very apparent in those who truly live it, like Ben and Mariely. 

Please join me in praying for Ben (and Mariely), that he soon gets out of the hospital and fully recovers prior to his ordination to the Diaconate this fall. Let’s additionally pray for all of those who lack faith and live in fear. May God bless all of us on our journeys. 

As always, please feel free to contact me at [email protected] with questions, comments, concerns, challenges, or prayer requests.  

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

God made you for GREATNESS!!!

 

Mark Joseph

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A Great Quote from Mr. Rogers

Who among us grew up watching Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood? I know many of my readers are from the Pittsburgh area, home of Fred Rogers. Even if you didn’t watch his show, which included Chef Brockett and Mr. McFeely, aka Speedy Delivery, most of us knew of him. Mr. Rogers was the creator of Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood, which ran from 1968 to 2001, as well as the host of all 895 episodes, the composer of its more than 200 songs, and the puppeteer who imagined 14 characters into being. Mr. Rogers was an icon who changed children’s television. 

Related to my source for the Mr. Rogers quote, I have a friend named Ed Blank, who spent 39 years as a drama and movie critic for the Pittsburgh newspapers and television stations. A Vietnam vet, I had lunch with Ed a few weeks ago. Now retired, the stories he told were absolutely enticing and included names like John Wayne, Johnny Cash, Carol Brunette, Burt Reynolds, and many more. I can’t wait to be with Ed again. 

During our lunch, Ed told me a story about Fred Rogers, who became a friend of his. He had overheard Fred say to someone, “remember, there is no such thing as a conflict-free life”. Ed later related that story back to Fred, who had no recollection of it. That didn’t mean it didn’t continue to have an impact on Ed, as it did me.  

“There is no such thing as a conflict-free life”. With the exception of “God loves you unconditionally”, there may not be a truer statement. Conflict can be national or international, like what’s going on in Afghanistan right now…an absolute and arguably avoidable mess. 

Most of the conflict we experience is more personal than global, taking place at home or work, with those we typically interact with most often. Like all other issues in life, the answer is in Scripture or taught by the Church. Related to how we are to handle conflict, check out Matthew 18:15-17. Added to what St. Matthew indicates, I would offer the following points. 

 

There is no such thing as a conflict-free life 

Consistent with Mr. Rogers as quoted by Ed, there is no such thing as a conflict-free life. If that’s your expectation, then you’re in for a hard time. Conflict is a part of life. We’d all do ourselves a favor in learning how to handle it. 

 

Although not all conflict is avoidable, much of it is

By establishing ground rules or expectations up front, so as to make sure there are no misunderstandings after the fact, can go a significant way in minimizing or eliminating conflict. Although not always possible or practical, I like to have things in writing. 

 

Conflict doesn’t have to be confrontational

Many people run from conflict because they think it automatically means confrontation. That is not true. Conflict done the right way is healthy. You could argue that you wouldn’t grow or become a better person without conflict. 

 

Attack the problem, not the person

Be empathetic. Nobody cares what you know until they know how much you care. You can’t be self-righteous and on-the-attack and expect a good outcome. Instead, be invested in resolution and agreement as opposed to being right. Two sayings that come to mind:

  • Hate the sin, not the sinner 
  • Love your neighbor as your self 

 

You can say anything to anyone, as long as you say it softly

Tone is so important. An elevated voice (or perception of one) makes people feel like they’re being attacked. No one responds well to that. Speak softly. Smile. Both go a long way. 

 

Communicate often and early

People don’t like to be surprised. Most are creatures of habit. Most people are planners, albeit sometimes only subconsciously. They don’t like to be left in the dark. They much prefer forewarning. Give people as much advance notice as possible and don’t be surprised by last minute things creating conflict.  

 

Identify to the other person your struggle with the situation

You may say something like, “You know, I’m not very comfortable bringing this topic up to you. The last thing I want to do is hurt your feelings or bring conflict between us. The truth is though, you’ve hurt my feelings. I’d love for you to help me talk through this. I’d like to understand what you really meant, in addition to sharing with you how I perceived it. I’m hopeful that we can resolve any issues between us. Are you willing to work through this with me?”

 

Do the above with those closest to you as well

Oftentimes with family (and very close friends), we fear conflict the most. I think that’s because we fear the risk of loss. We also have expectations and often unspoken agendas for those in our inner circle. As such, with emotion we react instead of respond. The suggestions above all work and arguably are most important for those so important to us. 

 

Thank you, Ed, for the story that prompted this blog. By extension, thank you to Mr. Rogers. Both men have stories steeped in life lessons for us.  

As always, please feel free to contact me at [email protected] with questions, comments, concerns, challenges, or prayer requests.  

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Remember…God made you for GREATNESS!!!

Mark Joseph

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What Leaders Have to Protect Against Most

I believe strongly that any organization unwilling to reach outside itself will die. The same can be said for an organization’s leaders. Related…although I am absolutely committed to Catholicism, I believe that north of 90% of what all Christians believe we have in common. These two things in combination lead me to Reverend Rick Warren, Founder and Senior Pastor of Saddleback Church in Orange County, CA.  

My wife and I have visited Saddleback, attended Sunday service (experiencing hospitality that you wouldn’t believe), and met with Saddleback’s Pastor of Small Groups. Again, absolutely committed to our Catholic faith, I/we can be learning from others. 

The above is a preface to a blog Pastor Rick recently wrote on “pride” and how destructive it can be. Paraphrased below, you can access the blog here.

Leaders can often become their own biggest obstacle. When they start to see fruitfulness, they may be tempted to make everything about themselves. This is pride. The Bible says it’s the root of every other sin.

Pride leads to conflict, prevents growth, leads to anxiety, and angers God. The opposite of pride is humility. That’s one characteristic we want and need to develop. Leading is a heavy responsibility. We cannot do it without God’s help. 

Humility is a choice. It is something we do to ourselves. So how do we develop it in our lives? Start with these five steps.

Admit your sins honestly.

We all sin, but the Bible is clear that God is ready to forgive us. Proverbs 28:13 says, “A man who refuses to admit his mistakes can never be successful. But if he confesses and forsakes them, he gets another chance”. God gives second chances (and third, fourth, and hundredth chances) to the humble.

Evaluate your strengths realistically.

You’ve probably heard the saying—maybe from your own parents—that you can be anything you want to be. But it’s not true. If you don’t have the talent for a particular role, you won’t be able to do it. 

To deal with pride in your life, you need to honestly evaluate your strengths and weaknesses. The Bible says, “Be honest in your estimate of yourselves, measuring your value by how much faith God has given you” (Romans 12:3). Pride is based on a false image of ourselves. Humility is based on a true and realistic image. Humility is being honest about both your strengths and weaknesses.

Enjoy your success gratefully. 

Remind yourself daily of two pride-busting truths. First, everything we have is a gift from God. Paul asks in 1 Corinthians 4:7, “What are you so puffed up about? What do you have that God hasn’t given you?”.

The truth is, we wouldn’t even have breath if God hadn’t given it to us. Anything God does through you isn’t about you. It’s about Him. Everything you achieve is about Him. 

Second, one day we will give an account before God for what we did with what He gave us. It’s hard to be prideful when you realize that one day every one of your secrets will be exposed. It’s a humbling realization.

Serve others unselfishly.

The greatest antidote to pride is to give yourself away by helping others. It’s the only way to live more happily and humbly. 

The Bible teaches: “Don’t be selfish; don’t live to make a good impression on others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself. Don’t just think about your own affairs, but be interested in others, too, and in what they are doing” (Philippians 2:3-4).

Humility isn’t thinking less of yourself; it’s thinking of yourself less. We need to get so busy serving others that we don’t have time for our own gripes and complaints. 

Depend on Jesus continually.

Depending on God is how we express humility. In fact, dependence is the heart of humility. God didn’t design us to be independent—but dependent on Him. Stress often comes from taking upon ourselves what we were never intended to do. 

You’ll never get rid of all the stress in your life, but you can depend upon God for the ultimate outcome. Your circumstances don’t have to determine your response. The Bible promises great blessings when we are humble and depend on God. Proverbs 22:4 says, “Respecting the Lord and not being proud will bring you wealth, honor, and life”.

Outwardly, you may be an extremely successful leader. But your success is not about you—it’s about what God will do through you. 

Thank you, Rev. Rick. Great stuff!!! I read Rev. Rick’s posts regularly. You can get them and other resources at https://pastors.com. Let’s learn together.  

As always, please feel free to contact me at [email protected] with questions, comments, concerns, challenges, or prayer requests.  

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

God made you for GREATNESS!!!

Mark Joseph

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Weekly Blog

The Recipe for Forgiveness

Do you have trouble forgiving others? Forgiving yourself? Do you hold resentments? The fact is that ongoing conflict with others is one of the primary impediments to peace in our lives. 

In last week’s blog, I cited Reverend Rick Warren of Saddleback Church. Although I don’t intend to make a long-term habit of it, I’m doing so again here. Rev. Rick has a great formula for forgiveness. Paraphrased below, you can get the full post here.

As per Rev. Rick, when you find yourself in the midst of conflict, here’s a simple five-step, biblical path to peace.

PLAN a peace meeting. (Matthew 5:24)

Take the initiative. Don’t wait for the other person to make the first move. It doesn’t matter if you’re the offended or the offender. It’s always your move. Take the initiative because Jesus said so. Plus, it shows that you’re more mature.

You will never resolve conflict accidentally. You must intentionally deal with it or it will never go away. In Matthew 5:24, Jesus emphasizes that you’re to begin this process “at once” . It’ll get harder the longer you wait.

EMPATHIZE with their feelings. (Philippians 5:24)

Once you begin the peace meeting, start with the other person’s pain. You’re usually thinking of your own hurts when you’re upset. You need to do the opposite. Think more about the other person than yourself. Try to understand the pain behind their angry words. Ask yourself, “How can I help the other person?”

One benefit of conflict is that it usually leads to greater intimacy in the relationship because it helps you better understand the other person as you empathize with their pain.

ATTACK the problem, not the person. (Proverbs 15:1)

You can’t focus on fixing the problem and fixing the blame at the same time. If you go to the peace meeting thinking you’ll blame the other person, then forget it. You can’t make peace like that. Proverbs 15:1 says, “A gentle answer quiets anger, but a harsh one stirs it up”.

Engage your mind before you engage your mouth. Then say helpful words, not ones that tear the other person down. As Paul writes in Ephesians 4:29, use “only helpful words, the kind that build up and provide what is needed”.

COOPERATE as much as possible. (Romans 12:18)

Be a bridge-builder and not a bridge-destroyer. In Romans 12:18, the Bible reminds us to live at peace with everyone, as much as possible. Your ability to get along should be a hallmark of your Christian life.

That means you must be willing to pay the cost. Peacemaking always has a cost. It will cost your ego and selfishness. You’ll need to give up your desire to always be right. And when you do, you’ll begin to build bridges.

EMPHASIZE reconciliation, not resolution. (2 Corinthians 5:18)

Reconciliation doesn’t mean you’ll resolve all the problems in your relationship. It simply means to reestablish the relationship. Often you have legitimate differences in your relationships and will never fully resolve them. Reconciliation means you bury the hatchet, not the issue. You keep talking about it, but you talk about it harmoniously. 

Reconciliation focuses on the relationship, not the problem.

The Bible tells us in 2 Corinthians 5:18 that God has modeled reconciliation for us. When you work to reconcile your relationships, you’re doing what God has already done in your relationship with Him. Working toward reconciliation is the most Christlike thing you can do.

You can become a peacemaker in your home, in your organization, and in your community. The Bible tells us, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God” (Matthew 5:9). 

You’ll notice that the first letter of the above steps create the acronym PEACE. I love how Rev. Rick always references Scripture. It’s a great reminder that all of life’s lessons can be found in the Bible and are taught by the Church. As indicated last week, you can find Rev. Rick at https://pastors.com. 

As always, please feel free to contact me at [email protected] with questions, comments, concerns, challenges, or prayer requests.  

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

God made you for GREATNESS!!!

Mark Joseph