Tag: Family

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Losing a Classmate

A couple weeks ago, I went to the funeral of a college classmate. Although I had not seen Midge, who died way too young, since graduating 35 years ago, I felt compelled to attend. Not a surprise, there I saw Mary Anne, Midge’s college roommate and lifelong best friend since grade school. My college roommate (Jim) and I had a connection with Midge and Mary Anne, in that we were all from Pittsburgh. We hadn’t known each other prior to college, nor did we see one another between semesters, but we had that common bond that connected us. Interesting how that happens.

Realizing that it’s 35 years ago and my memory isn’t what it used to be, I can’t remember ever seeing Midge separate from Mary Anne. They were inseparable….always together. And always, always SMILING AND LAUGHING. Reflecting on it, I can’t recall ever meeting two more joy filled people during that time in my life. What a great memory.

Fr. Tom, who was the Celebrant for Midge’s Funeral Mass, is Mary Anne’s brother, and as such has known Midge his entire life. During his homily/eulogy, he told stories of her life, always smiling and laughing, always bringing joy to other people. While he also used words like “love” and “courage”, he said his lasting memory of Midge would be “joy”. Independent of circumstance, she apparently never lost that joy during her 20-month battle with cancer.

Over the last 60 days, I lost two other friends who exuded pure joy. They are Fr. Jose Robles-Sanchez and Joy Rapp, two outstanding individuals I knew from our Steubenville Conference Ministry. Again, always smiling and like Midge, always concerned about the other person. Always bringing joy to others.

Being my age or younger, all three died way too young. If we believe what we say we believe (and I do), we know they’re in a much better place. Praise God!!! But what about us? What are we to do? What lessons do we take from losing such wonderful people…so young?

Here’s one of my lessons. We’ve all heard that love is a decision, not a feeling. In unpacking that, I think we can agree it is true. For me, I’d like to make joy a decision, not an emotion. Looking at Midge and Mary Anne, Fr. Jose and Joy as examples, I want to live in a place of joy, independent of substance or circumstance. I want to smile and laugh. I want to bring joy to others.

As evidenced on my website and the things I write about and speak on, I firmly believe that there is a Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment. I also believe that God made each of us uniquely, with special gifts, for a specific purpose. God made you for Greatness!! It’s in using those gifts and pursuing your God given purpose that you can experience joy (along with peace and fulfillment). There’s one more important factor. To experience true joy, again independent of substance or circumstance, you need to know the unconditional love of Jesus Christ (if you want more info on that, please reach out to me). May we all be so blessed!!!

As always, please contact me at [email protected] with questions, comments, concerns, challenges, or prayer requests.

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Remember…God made you for GREATNESS!!!

Mark Joseph

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Weekly Blog

Is Satan Real?

My wife (Cyndi) and I just watched the movie, Let Him Go, where Kevin Costner (George) and Diane Lane (Margaret) play parents to their son who dies in a horse accident. Their widowed daughter-in-law (Lorna) remarries to what turns out be an abusive husband. Prior to the new couple moving out of town without telling anyone, Margaret witnesses the abuse levied on her 3-yearold grandson (Jimmy) and her daughter-in-law.

Set in the early 1960s, the grandparents leave their Montana home for North Dakota to find their grandson. What they found was not only startling to them, but to the viewer (Cyndi and me included). Lorna’s new mother-in-law, Blanch, is an absolute “witch”. In fact, that word can’t begin to describe how evil this woman is. A more appropriate word would be Satan.

Blanch, incredibly controlling, had her grown sons under her spell, all complicit in her evil. Although dark, it’s a compelling movie, where good prevails over evil, where one sacrifices his life to save others, while stepping on the head of Satan. Sound familiar?

The next morning, I said to Cyndi in referencing the movie, “you know, there are truly evil people in this world”. It’s not difficult to identify them, i.e. ISIS fighters, numerous foreign dictators who oppress their people, even those in our country who commit violent and/or deviant crimes, especially to the young. As I’ve indicated in previous blogs, as Christians we believe that abortion is an intrinsic evil as well.

We can see Satan in the examples above. For those who don’t think about it, Satan is clearly active in our world. In last week’s post, I indicated that we are all beloved children of God. Although it can be difficult to understand, so are those who commit such atrocities. Given their free will, they’ve turned their back on God and choose evil instead. Related to heaven or hell, again God allows our free will to determine our ultimate destination.

Is Satan real to you?

Does your spirituality include consideration of the evil one? I never gave it much consideration prior to my conversion, but since there are times that I’ve felt under attack by Satan. And I certainly see the work of Satan in our world.

The above isn’t meant to scare you, but to identify the role of Satan in our lives. We know there is good and evil in our world. We also know that Jesus Christ was brutally crucified, enduring a torturous death, to conquer sin, to provide us with a path to salvation. He loves us that much. God the Father loves us that much, sacrificing His only begotten Son so that we can have the opportunity for eternal life.

Fear, anxiety, anger, violence, division, abuse (and many more) are the work of Satan. It’s only in knowing the unconditional love of Jesus Christ that:

  • The unimaginable is achievable
  • There can be Heaven here on earth
  • You can be on a distinct path to peace, joy, and fulfillment

As always, feel free to contact me at [email protected] with questions, comments, concerns, challenges, or prayer requests.

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Remember…God made you for GREATNESS!!!

Mark Joseph

 

 

 

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Weekly Blog

What “Assume” Really Means

You’ve probably heard before that “assume” means “making an ‘ass’ out of ‘u’ and ‘me’”. Well, this past week, I was the “ass”. I made an assumption about someone and something that caused me to respond in a way I now regret.

In the circumstance I’m referring to, the details to which aren’t important here, the person I offended thought he was responding to an invitation by me. Here’s the thing…he was correct. I asked for his opinion and then I got upset when he gave it to me.

What gives? What’s wrong with me? First, I’m human and I’m a sinner, far from being a perfect individual. That said, what just happened has caused me to reflect.

Some observations.

To start, a brief comment about the phrase. When referring to “u” and “me”, the real “ass” is me, the person making the assumption. Although a poor assumption can make a mess out of things for both individuals, it’s the person making the assumption who has egg on his or her face, who’s responsible for the problems caused.

With a simple internet search, I found several articles, one of which by Dr. Marcia Sirota (marciasirotamd.com), who makes the point that “instead of basing our understanding of people and events on what we observe and what we know for a fact, we often prefer to make judgments based on our emotions, beliefs, expectations and wishes”.

She suggests always asking ourselves, “how do I know this?” If the answer to that question is anything other than “I learned it through observing the evidence or through obtaining factual information,” then we’re at risk of making an incorrect assumption.

Why Do We Make Assumptions?

The answer again is…we’re human.

We often jump to conclusions or make an assumption based on our past experiences or perceptions. Although we all do it, I’d like to be doing less of it. I think one thing I can do is ask the question proposed above by Dr. Sirota…”how do I know this?”

To do the above, I need to slow down…and not just “jump”, but ponder and reflect. I can’t be so quick to react, but thoughtfully respond. That said, I think there are two things that cause us to “assume” or jump to conclusions:

  • Pride – defined as a high or inordinate opinion of one’s own dignity, importance, merit, or superiority, whether as cherished in the mind or as displayed in bearing, conduct, etc. Pride expresses itself in “ego”, which is an acronym for “edge God out”.
  • Lack of self-love is related to pride and ego, among other things. Counter intuitive, the less we love or like ourselves, the more important it is for us to be right, to be on top, which expresses itself through pride and ego….in making assumptions or jumping to conclusions.

We are all beloved children of God, loved beyond imagine and made for greatness. Central to our calling is to love one another…through patience and kindness. Please join me in trying to no longer be the “ass”, instead of assuming…verifying and instead of reacting…responding.

As always, please feel free to contact me at [email protected] with comments, questions, concerns, challenges, or prayer requests.

May God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!
Remember…You were Made for GREATNESS!!!

Mark Joseph

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Weekly Blog

The Gift of an All Knowing, Ever Present Mentor

If a parent, maybe you can identify with the following. It has been humbling for me to see our three kids, all of whom are now married, go to their spouses for advice instead of me and my wife. I assume I did the same when I newly married. That said, it’s interesting. With all due respect to our two sons-in-law and our daughter-in-law, each of whom we like a great deal, they don’t have our same life experiences.

As interesting is watching our kids as they matured, making the same mistakes we did when we were their age. Again, not unlike us in our youth, they didn’t go to those in the know. If like me, you’ve probably said to yourself or them, “I wish you would have asked me about that”. It’s just part of human nature…to not learn the lesson without making the mistake.

Here are some questions for us to ponder:

  1. How would you feel if you had someone in your life who knew you better than anyone else; knew your strengths and weaknesses, your likes and dislikes; what it is you were designed for, your life’s calling?
  2. What if that person were always there for you, always present and never letting you down; constantly there to pick you up no matter how many times you fell down, always helping you course correct and prepare for the future?
  3. What if that person loved you so much that his or her ultimate goal was your happiness, your peace, joy, and fulfillment?
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

Wouldn’t it be wonderful to have a mentor like the above? Given my first 57 years, with hindsight what it is, I could have saved myself many, many challenges. Assuming I had the maturity and humility to listen, having an all-knowing, ever-present, all loving-mentor would have been a game changer.

I have some good news and some bad news. Let’s do the bad first. There is no one on this earth, for the history of humanity, who has been capable of 1-3 above. With best efforts and really great people in many of our lives, the above is just an impossibility. Blame it on the human condition.

Here’s the very good news. What is described above in 1-3 does exist in the Person of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior.

  • As evidenced by His torturous death on the Cross, He loves you unconditionally, wanting the very best for you.
  • It’s scriptural (Jeremiah 1:5 and 29:11, John 10:10) that God His Father, made you for greatness, knowing intimately your every gift and talent.
  • Through His Holy Spirit, He’s always with you…always.

There’s an expression in the recovery program (AA), that I believe can serve all of us, no matter who we are or what our experiences. That is, “let go and let God”. How do we know our Heavenly Mentor….by being in relationship with Him and abiding by His Will. We do that through prayer and the Sacraments (if Catholic), through encounter and community.

Doing the above, which is a function of embracing God’s unconditional love, will result in for you:

  • The unimaginable being achievable
  • Living Heaven here on earth
  • Experiencing true Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment

As always, please reach out to me at [email protected], with questions, comments, concerns, challenges and/or prayer requests.

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfilment!!!

Mark Joseph