Tag: Family

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What Leaders Have to Protect Against Most

I believe strongly that any organization unwilling to reach outside itself will die. The same can be said for an organization’s leaders. Related…although I am absolutely committed to Catholicism, I believe that north of 90% of what all Christians believe we have in common. These two things in combination lead me to Reverend Rick Warren, Founder and Senior Pastor of Saddleback Church in Orange County, CA.  

My wife and I have visited Saddleback, attended Sunday service (experiencing hospitality that you wouldn’t believe), and met with Saddleback’s Pastor of Small Groups. Again, absolutely committed to our Catholic faith, I/we can be learning from others. 

The above is a preface to a blog Pastor Rick recently wrote on “pride” and how destructive it can be. Paraphrased below, you can access the blog here.

Leaders can often become their own biggest obstacle. When they start to see fruitfulness, they may be tempted to make everything about themselves. This is pride. The Bible says it’s the root of every other sin.

Pride leads to conflict, prevents growth, leads to anxiety, and angers God. The opposite of pride is humility. That’s one characteristic we want and need to develop. Leading is a heavy responsibility. We cannot do it without God’s help. 

Humility is a choice. It is something we do to ourselves. So how do we develop it in our lives? Start with these five steps.

Admit your sins honestly.

We all sin, but the Bible is clear that God is ready to forgive us. Proverbs 28:13 says, “A man who refuses to admit his mistakes can never be successful. But if he confesses and forsakes them, he gets another chance”. God gives second chances (and third, fourth, and hundredth chances) to the humble.

Evaluate your strengths realistically.

You’ve probably heard the saying—maybe from your own parents—that you can be anything you want to be. But it’s not true. If you don’t have the talent for a particular role, you won’t be able to do it. 

To deal with pride in your life, you need to honestly evaluate your strengths and weaknesses. The Bible says, “Be honest in your estimate of yourselves, measuring your value by how much faith God has given you” (Romans 12:3). Pride is based on a false image of ourselves. Humility is based on a true and realistic image. Humility is being honest about both your strengths and weaknesses.

Enjoy your success gratefully. 

Remind yourself daily of two pride-busting truths. First, everything we have is a gift from God. Paul asks in 1 Corinthians 4:7, “What are you so puffed up about? What do you have that God hasn’t given you?”.

The truth is, we wouldn’t even have breath if God hadn’t given it to us. Anything God does through you isn’t about you. It’s about Him. Everything you achieve is about Him. 

Second, one day we will give an account before God for what we did with what He gave us. It’s hard to be prideful when you realize that one day every one of your secrets will be exposed. It’s a humbling realization.

Serve others unselfishly.

The greatest antidote to pride is to give yourself away by helping others. It’s the only way to live more happily and humbly. 

The Bible teaches: “Don’t be selfish; don’t live to make a good impression on others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself. Don’t just think about your own affairs, but be interested in others, too, and in what they are doing” (Philippians 2:3-4).

Humility isn’t thinking less of yourself; it’s thinking of yourself less. We need to get so busy serving others that we don’t have time for our own gripes and complaints. 

Depend on Jesus continually.

Depending on God is how we express humility. In fact, dependence is the heart of humility. God didn’t design us to be independent—but dependent on Him. Stress often comes from taking upon ourselves what we were never intended to do. 

You’ll never get rid of all the stress in your life, but you can depend upon God for the ultimate outcome. Your circumstances don’t have to determine your response. The Bible promises great blessings when we are humble and depend on God. Proverbs 22:4 says, “Respecting the Lord and not being proud will bring you wealth, honor, and life”.

Outwardly, you may be an extremely successful leader. But your success is not about you—it’s about what God will do through you. 

Thank you, Rev. Rick. Great stuff!!! I read Rev. Rick’s posts regularly. You can get them and other resources at https://pastors.com. Let’s learn together.  

As always, please feel free to contact me at [email protected] with questions, comments, concerns, challenges, or prayer requests.  

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

God made you for GREATNESS!!!

Mark Joseph

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The Recipe for Forgiveness

Do you have trouble forgiving others? Forgiving yourself? Do you hold resentments? The fact is that ongoing conflict with others is one of the primary impediments to peace in our lives. 

In last week’s blog, I cited Reverend Rick Warren of Saddleback Church. Although I don’t intend to make a long-term habit of it, I’m doing so again here. Rev. Rick has a great formula for forgiveness. Paraphrased below, you can get the full post here.

As per Rev. Rick, when you find yourself in the midst of conflict, here’s a simple five-step, biblical path to peace.

PLAN a peace meeting. (Matthew 5:24)

Take the initiative. Don’t wait for the other person to make the first move. It doesn’t matter if you’re the offended or the offender. It’s always your move. Take the initiative because Jesus said so. Plus, it shows that you’re more mature.

You will never resolve conflict accidentally. You must intentionally deal with it or it will never go away. In Matthew 5:24, Jesus emphasizes that you’re to begin this process “at once” . It’ll get harder the longer you wait.

EMPATHIZE with their feelings. (Philippians 5:24)

Once you begin the peace meeting, start with the other person’s pain. You’re usually thinking of your own hurts when you’re upset. You need to do the opposite. Think more about the other person than yourself. Try to understand the pain behind their angry words. Ask yourself, “How can I help the other person?”

One benefit of conflict is that it usually leads to greater intimacy in the relationship because it helps you better understand the other person as you empathize with their pain.

ATTACK the problem, not the person. (Proverbs 15:1)

You can’t focus on fixing the problem and fixing the blame at the same time. If you go to the peace meeting thinking you’ll blame the other person, then forget it. You can’t make peace like that. Proverbs 15:1 says, “A gentle answer quiets anger, but a harsh one stirs it up”.

Engage your mind before you engage your mouth. Then say helpful words, not ones that tear the other person down. As Paul writes in Ephesians 4:29, use “only helpful words, the kind that build up and provide what is needed”.

COOPERATE as much as possible. (Romans 12:18)

Be a bridge-builder and not a bridge-destroyer. In Romans 12:18, the Bible reminds us to live at peace with everyone, as much as possible. Your ability to get along should be a hallmark of your Christian life.

That means you must be willing to pay the cost. Peacemaking always has a cost. It will cost your ego and selfishness. You’ll need to give up your desire to always be right. And when you do, you’ll begin to build bridges.

EMPHASIZE reconciliation, not resolution. (2 Corinthians 5:18)

Reconciliation doesn’t mean you’ll resolve all the problems in your relationship. It simply means to reestablish the relationship. Often you have legitimate differences in your relationships and will never fully resolve them. Reconciliation means you bury the hatchet, not the issue. You keep talking about it, but you talk about it harmoniously. 

Reconciliation focuses on the relationship, not the problem.

The Bible tells us in 2 Corinthians 5:18 that God has modeled reconciliation for us. When you work to reconcile your relationships, you’re doing what God has already done in your relationship with Him. Working toward reconciliation is the most Christlike thing you can do.

You can become a peacemaker in your home, in your organization, and in your community. The Bible tells us, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God” (Matthew 5:9). 

You’ll notice that the first letter of the above steps create the acronym PEACE. I love how Rev. Rick always references Scripture. It’s a great reminder that all of life’s lessons can be found in the Bible and are taught by the Church. As indicated last week, you can find Rev. Rick at https://pastors.com. 

As always, please feel free to contact me at [email protected] with questions, comments, concerns, challenges, or prayer requests.  

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

God made you for GREATNESS!!!

Mark Joseph

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Weekly Blog

Living in the Bubble

I’ve come to believe most (maybe all) things we truly engage in are about encounter and community. Take sports or a hobby…we have a first encounter or introduction, most often followed by support like training, coordination, events, i.e. games. Experienced in person or online, community is affirming.

The same is true with our faith. To be truly engaged, there’s been an encounter…with Jesus, our Lord and Savior. Encounter can then also be one on one with others. Examples of community are worshipping together (for Catholics…Mass), small groups, like-minded friends, ministry or mission work, etc. All are affirming.

I have the privilege of working at Franciscan University of Steubenville, in the Office of Outreach and Evangelization. As part of my work, I travel the country for our Steubenville Conferences. I get to associate with the best of the best Catholic authors and speakers, all holy people. I’m honored to call our regional partners friends, all joy-filled people committed to sharing the love of Christ. Every year, I see literally thousands and thousands evangelized.

I run into others outside of work who I’m connected to through my faith. Our church, even with its challenges, has so much to offer. Pre-COVID, my wife and I were part of a vibrant Parish (we need to get back to that). I belong to a small group, a free, online Steubenville Discipleship Quad. All of my friends are on my same journey of loving God, loving others, and sharing our faith.

I fondly refer to all of the above as my “bubble”, the bubble. I love living in the bubble. In that bubble, I have encounter…with Jesus and with others one on one. I also have community…all of us heading in the same direction, the right direction.

 

It’s a Crazy World

We live in a crazy world, that has gotten crazier over the last six months. I refer to it as bizzarro world. What’s going on is unimaginable…or at least it was 12 months ago for most Americans.

Given society’s challenges, I thank God for the bubble. I’m incredibly appreciative of my encounters (including and especially with Jesus) and my community. It’s hard to imagine life without both. My bubble is my safe place, the joy filled experiences, where authentic relationships live, where common bonds are had because common beliefs are shared.

All of us are called to go outside the bubble as well, where we love God, love others, and share our faith. It’s our call from Jesus in the Great Commandments and Great Commission. It’s also our passion, given the gift of Christ we’ve been given. While I love being in the bubble, I know I have to go outside it…to help it grow.

Given that you’re reading this blog, I assume you have your version of the “God” bubble. Maybe the above is suggesting a new or expanded context for you. Go outside your bubble. It’s our calling. That said, embrace your bubble. Grow the relationships within your bubble. Engage. Encounter. Enjoy community and be affirmed by it. God is great. Your bubble is a great place to experience Him and others on the journey.

As always, feel free to contact me at [email protected] with comments, questions, concerns, challenges, or prayer requests.

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Remember…God made you for GREATNESS!!!

Mark Joseph

 

 

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Weekly Blog

We’re All Broken

Years ago, I gave my testimony at a Catholic Men’s Fellowship event. Following me was a man whose name I don’t recall. However, he asked a question that I’ve never forgotten, that is “you know when you ask someone how they’re doing and the say ‘good’; do you know they’re lying?”

How true is the above? So many of us rarely share our true feelings, instead putting forward a gruff exterior…believing that we’re unique in our challenges. Nothing could be further from the truth. The fact is…we’re all broken. 

This issue is central to my ministry. Praise God…Jesus is the answer to our universal brokenness. Only in following Him leads us to a path of peace, joy, and fulfillment.  

Matthew West sings a song, Truth Be Told, which speaks to our brokenness and always lying about it. It could be the theme song of Mark Joseph Ministries.  

I’d encourage you to close your eyes and listen to Matthew sing it here. Then pray through the lyrics, which are below. 

Truth Be Told

Lie number one you’re supposed to have it all together
And when they ask how you’re doing
Just smile and tell them, “Never better”

Lie number 2 everybody’s life is perfect except yours
So keep your messes and your wounds
And your secrets safe with you behind closed doors

Truth be told
The truth is rarely told

Now I say I’m fine, yeah I’m fine oh I’m fine, hey I’m fine but I’m not
I’m broken
And when it’s out of control I say it’s under control but it’s not
And you know it
I don’t know why it’s so hard to admit it
When being honest is the only way to fix it
There’s no failure, no fall
There’s no sin you don’t already know
So let the truth be told

There’s a sign on the door, says, “Come as you are” but I doubt it
‘Cause if we lived like it was true, every Sunday morning pew would be crowded
But didn’t you say the church should look more like a hospital
A safe place for the sick, the sinner and the scarred and the prodigals
Like me

Well truth be told
The truth is rarely told
Oh am I the only one who says

I’m fine, yeah I’m fine oh I’m fine, hey I’m fine but I’m not
I’m broken
And when it’s out of control I say it’s under control but it’s not
And you know it
I don’t know why it’s so hard to admit it
When being honest is the only way to fix it
There’s no failure, no fall
There’s no sin you don’t already know
So let the truth be told

Can I really stand here unashamed
Knowin’ that your love for me won’t change?
Oh God if that’s really true
Then let the truth be told

I say I’m fine, yeah I’m fine oh I’m fine, hey I’m fine but I’m not
I’m broken
And when it’s out of control I say it’s under control but it’s not
And you know it
I don’t know why it’s so hard to admit it
When being honest is the only way to fix it
There’s no failure, no fall
There’s no sin you don’t already know
Yeah I know

There’s no failure, no fall
There’s no sin you don’t already know
So let the truth be told

 

Thank you, Matthew for such a great song. Thank you, God for loving us more than we’ll ever know, no matter what we’ve ever done. 

As always, feel free to contact me at [email protected] with comments, questions, concerns, challenges, or prayer requests. 

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Remember…God made you for GREATNESS!!!

Mark Joseph