Tag: loss

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Is Heaven For Real?

Last month marks the 3rd anniversary of my father’s passing. At his funeral, really a celebration of his life, I made the point as part of his eulogy that if we believe what we believe (and I do), that he is in a much better place. My dad didn’t fear death. Near the end, he repeatedly said to my brothers and me, “I’m tired, I want to go home to our Lord”. When I said to him, “Dad, that’s not easy to hear”, he responded with, “it’s very easy to say”. In a great place spiritually, he was looking forward to what he understood to be Heaven.

In our increasingly more secular world, it must be so sad for so many, who don’t believe in God and as such, can’t believe in Heaven. Without faith, there is such a finality to death. That’s it. The end. As Christians, we know there is so much more.

Heaven is referenced multiple times in Scripture and there are numerous books written on the subject. My wife couldn’t find enough of them to read after losing her father 5 years ago. A few of her favorites include:

  • Heaven is for Real, by Todd and Sonja Burpo
  • Proof of Heaven, by Dr. Eben Alexander
  • 90 Minutes in Heaven, by Don Piper

Many Believe The Challenge To Be Too Great

For many, they don’t believe they can get to Heaven, given their understanding of what they need to do during their life in order to attain it. The perception is often…all the things that we need to give up, all the rules we need to follow, in order to get there. People come to believe that they can’t have fun, can’t do what they want, and can’t be who they are if they want to go to Heaven.

To compound things, many have an understanding of Heaven, given how it’s often described or given their own perceptions, that it is something far off, very theoretical, metaphorical, and not practical…that it is incredibly difficult to attain. So the thought becomes, “I need to sacrifice so much here to get to a place I don’t even understand”.

Living Heaven Here on Earth

Here’s the reality, not only is there Heaven as related to our eternity, but we can live Heaven here on earth.

The fact is that it’s impossible (yes, I said IMPOSSIBLE) to find Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment living the life that the world professes. I refer to them as the 4 Ps, prominence, possessions, people, and pleasure. Although all can bring short-term happiness, none can result in long-term joy.

The only way to experience that joy, true peace in your life, is to say “yes” to our Lord, Jesus Christ. Sometimes a decision, most often requiring conversion (topic of past blogs), there is nothing like it. In fact, you can’t find a person who has said “yes” to Jesus who would ever be willing to go back to their old life. No one.

It’s in truly knowing Jesus that you become passionate about sharing the good news of the Gospel. With the passion so deep, you will also endeavor to live the life of Jesus. A Scripture passage that comes to mind is…. Matthew 25:44, “Lord, when did we see You hungry, or thirsty, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister to You?” Then He shall respond to them by saying: “Amen I say to you, whenever you did not do it to one of these least, neither did you do it to Me”. We need to see Christ in all and be Christ to all.

Living our faith, these things become our strongest desires. Instead of the 4 Ps, they are what we want to do. Living as described above is not only a life of Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment, but Heaven here on earth.

As always, please feel free to contact me with any questions, comments, or challenges at [email protected].

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Mark Joseph

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Weekly Blog

Losing Those Close To Us

Today is three years since my Dad died, and I miss him dearly. With the exception of my wife, there’s probably no one I talked to more frequently. He was always there, my biggest fan and advocate. I wrote about him on October 23rd, 2019. 

My Dad didn’t die suddenly, but was failing over a period of time. The same was true for my father-in-law and most of the people I’ve lost in my life. Now 59 myself, the list is extensive, including all my grandparents, aunts, uncles, and others…most where it wasn’t a surprise by the time they reached the end. I have a cousin, Eric who died almost 30 years ago at the age of 30, from Hodgkin disease. With him beginning his cancer journey at age 9, it wasn’t a surprise, although very sad and felt different given how young he was. 

My father and mother

Jim Sweeney, acclaimed offensive lineman at Pitt, followed by the New York Jets and the Steelers, just suddenly died at age 60. I had the privilege of knowing Jim, playing high school football with him and reconnecting when in our early 40s. With all his success, you’d never meet a more humble person than Jim. What a great guy, who will be missed by many. 

Jim was a shock. The deaths of the others, as indicated, were expected. Brian, a friend who I’ve known for almost 30 years, is in a different category for me. Still with us while fighting a cancer that has progressed significantly, it’s tough to watch. Maybe it’s different because Brian is 10 years younger than me. Or because I’m of the age where my own mortality is more relevant. Or knowing the age of his kids, sensing what this is doing to his family. 

I say “watch” above figuratively because I’ve not seen Brian often (couple times) since his diagnosis. I feel badly in not being more present to him. We talk and text periodically. I pray for him and his family often. None of it seems like enough.

Where am I going with this?

What’s my point? I think it’s three things…love, gratitude, and reflection. Taking the last first, I think we can learn a lot in reflecting on the lives of others. What are the lessons for us? Their impact on our lives? The things they may have done differently. We can also reflect on how we interacted with them…the things we would change for the future with others. 

Born out of that reflection should be gratitude…for their lives, our relationships, and the lessons learned. When talking about death and suffering, it’s sometimes difficult to have an “attitude of gratitude”, understanding as I often say, “everything happens for a reason, according to God’s grand plan”. Believing that God doesn’t create these things, it’s my lived experience that He allows them to bring a greater good, have us grow closer to Him, and internalize His unconditional love. 

Lastly is love, which arguably always comes first. Above all else as Jesus tells us in the Great Commandments, we’re called to love…love God and love our neighbors. While still on this earth, we need to love them, love them, love them, which can take many forms. That love can’t wait till they’re gone. We need to act. I need to act, not letting the busyness of life get in the way, not being distracted by the unimportant. 

Here’s my encouragement to all of us. Life is precious. Life is short. Let’s love each other, including those sick, suffering, or in need. Let’s be grateful for the lives of others, and our relationship with them. Let’s continue to learn all that we can from those who go before us, so we can live the lives God calls us to. 

As always, please email me with questions, concerns, comments, or prayer requests at [email protected].  

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Remember…God made you for Greatness!!!

Mark Joseph

Categories
Weekly Blog

Just Lost My Dad, Whose Life can be an Example for All

My father died a week ago Saturday and his funeral was this past Friday. Given the long and blessed life that he led, the last week was really a celebration. And that celebration had everything to do with the impact he had and the example that he was.

We received many comments from many family members and friends…some of which include:

  • Everyone has heroes in life that they look up to. I am no different. Yesterday we lost one of mine
  • He stepped into my life when it was crumbling; he took me in emotionally and gave me strength. I’ll never forget how special and loved he made me feel
  • I’m blessed to have had so much time with your Dad
  • I can’t stop thinking about all the good times and advice that your Dad gave me
  • He was an unbelievably great person and a role model for how a father should act
  • I loved that man and admired him so much
  • I think of him fondly…what an impact he had on me
  • Your Dad was a great man and a big influence on my life
  • Your father is one of the more important guideposts in my life. More than probably any other adult who I grew up with…besides my own father
  • I’m a better man having known your Dad

Hearing similar things about him over the years, in addition to our own experiences, it wasn’t a total surprise for my mother, my 3 brothers, or me, although very gratifying.

From Modest Beginnings to Success

My dad and his siblings had a very modest childhood. Having his first job at age 7, he helped to support his family before paying his way through college. He would eventually own 3 successful small businesses and be active politically, first at the state and national levels as a leader in the pro-life movement. That was followed by being highly engaged internationally, working for peace in the Middle East, which had him engaged with kings and queens, other foreign heads of state, US presidents, vice presidents, senators, and congressmen.

What would impress most didn’t impress him at all. He liked to remind us that everyone puts their pants on the same way…one leg at a time.

The Impact He Had on So Many

So, the question is how his upbringing and lived experiences resulted in so many being so drawn to him. I think it was his humility, coupled with his compassion and his confidence, especially in others. People felt special when with him; they felt safe. He was other focused, deeply caring about others.

When you had a conversation with our dad, you had his full attention. He made you feel important, valued, and understood. He made you see yourself through his eyes and he saw you with infinite possibility.

He was the same with our family. I think the greatest example our father could have given his sons is how a husband is to love his wife. He loved, loved, loved our mother. We heard it 100s, if not 1000s of times, “your mother is the greatest gift God ever gave me”. Married for 57 years, they were best friends. They were inseparable.

As good an example he was as a husband, he equally exuded what it meant to be a great father, truly investing in his 4 sons, collectively and individually. He was always encouraging, teaching, coaching, mentoring, and loving us…as related to the sports we played and the endeavors we pursued.

My Mum and Dad with their Grandchildren

Living His Faith…Answering the Call

A regular Sunday Mass attendee his entire life, my dad had his conversion when he was 71. From that time until near his death at age 84, he was a daily Mass attendee and Communicant. And every day at 3PM, he prayed both the Divine Mercy Chaplet and the Rosary. He had an expression he used prior to procedures that he’d have done in the later part of his life, “it will be ok and if it’s not ok, it will be ok”. He was in a great place spiritually, saying to my brothers and me towards the end, “I’m tired; I want to go be with our Lord”.

In Matthew 22: 37-39, Jesus gave us the Great Commandments, where He said, “love God your Father with your hole heart, hole mind, hole soul, and hole strength; love your neighbor as yourself”. In addition to the Great Commission (Matthew 28:19-20), it is arguably the most impactful thing Jesus told us. Our father, Robert Joseph, did both in exemplary fashion:

  • loved his God
  • loved his wife, sons, and so many others

If we believe what we believe…and I do, our father is in a much better place. We’ll miss him, but we know that he’s at peace with our Lord, Jesus Christ. Can’t wait to see him again. We love you, Dad!!!

Feel free to contact me with questions or comments at [email protected].

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Mark Joseph