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Week #6 – Life’s Tragedies

Hey *|FNAME|*,

This is the 6th of our 14-week free program, where we provide Lesson #6, on Life’s Tragedies. One of the most commonly asked questions related to faith is, “how can an all-loving God allow so much tragedy to take place?”

Not being a theologian or Scripture scholar, I’m not going to give you the theological answer, but one that is based on my experiences. Here it is….God allows tragedy to take place in our lives to bring us closer to Himself (God). Tragedy is what got me to intensely engage in my faith. It’s the thing that got most of my friends to engage as well.

Think about it…when things are going swimmingly well, when you’re “fat, dumb, and happy”, as they say, you think you’re doing just fine on your own. You don’t need anyone, much less God, with what most perceive as all His rules and restrictions.

We Want God in Tough Times

Instead, it’s times of tragedy when we determine that we can’t do it on our own. We know we need help. We often ache for someone to come along side us. That someone is the person of Jesus Christ.

I just heard the other day that prayer is up over 30%, with the COVID 19 pandemic. An article on Crux quotes Jeanet Sinding Bentzen, an associate professor in the Department of Economics at the University of Copenhagen, Denmark, who said, “the rising interest in seeking information about “prayer” on Google skyrocketed during the month of March 2020 when COVID-19 went global”.

I remember when 9/11 took place. Churches were packed and confession lines long, with people at abortion clinics and adult bookstores declining in number for a long period of time. When tragedy occurs, people seek God.

Photo by Pixabay from Pexels

Tragedy Helps Us

I know these all sound like clichés…

  • God doesn’t give us anything that we can’t handle
  • What doesn’t break us makes us stronger
  • God gives us the opportunity to make a ministry out of our messes

My wife and I sometimes kid around, saying it would be nice if we could eliminate a tragedy here or crisis there, from our lives. The fact is that it takes every experience we have to make us who we are. And I thank God for all of it, including the significant tragedies in my life, because I know I wouldn’t be who I am today, doing what I do, without having experienced them. Praise God!!!

Suggested Actions

So, what do we do about it? How do we handle the inevitable tragedy in our lives? Given my experience, I would suggest:

  • Think about the following questions, taking them to prayer:
    • How have the tragedies in your life shaped you?
    • Look for the lessons in what you’ve gone through…they are there; you just need to be open to them.
  • During your morning prayer routine this week:
    • Try to be in a place of gratitude, thanking God for everything that’s taken place in your life.
    • Concentrate on the positive. What positive thing from that tragedy would not be present in your life today?
  • Watch this Friday’s video on this same subject….it will be emailed to you.

Note: This isn’t easy stuff. I’ve been there. I promise you…as we work through these lessons and as you embrace the additional material, this “tragedy” piece is going to make more sense.

Please join us next Wednesday for Week #7 when we talk about our wounds and resentments. As always, please feel free to get to me with questions, comments, or concerns at [email protected].

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Mark Joseph

P.S. Living in a place of gratitude means understanding that nothing happens by accident. The day I wrote this blog, my wife and I watched “I Still Believe” (Movie Trailer), a movie about singer-songwriter Jeremy Camp and his first wife. If you want to see a story about “why” tragedy and great hope, watch “I Still Believe”.

 

Week #1 – Being Overwhelmed
Week #2 – Earning the love of others
Week #3 – Lack of self-love
Week #4 – Fear
Week #5 – False gods, False happiness
Week #6 – Life’s Tragedies
Week #7 – Wounds, Resentments

Week #8 – Discovering God’s Love
Week #9 – Forgiveness and healing
Week #10 – Becoming the best Possible You
Week #11 – Path to Peace
Week #12 – Finding your Purpose
Week #13 – You were made for Greatness
Week #14 – True Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment

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Weekly Blog

Week #5 – False Gods, False Happiness

This is the 5th of our 14-week free program, where we provide Lesson #5, on false gods and false happiness. Here are some questions to consider:

  • What is “it” that you think will make you happy?
  • Does “it” bring you true happiness?
  • What do you spend most of your time on? Or money on?

Johnny Lee sings a song called, “Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places”. I believe most of us are guilty of that…in addition to looking for happiness in all the wrong places. I heard not long ago…we can never get enough of what we really don’t need. Think about that in your life. What are those things that you’re chasing, that you think are going to make you happy?

I’ve identified them as the 4 Ps, prominence, possessions, pleasure, and people. Let’s explore each:

  • Prominence – if we’re honest, most of us want to stand out, to be noticed. Prominence makes us feel respected and admired, held in high esteem, and most importantly, loved.
  • Possessions – houses, cars, clothes, gadgets, etc. It doesn’t matter the socioeconomics, we all value “stuff”. One indication of this is the amount of personal debt many people have, living way beyond their means.
  • Pleasure – is dependent on specific circumstances. Unlike joy, pleasure only takes place in the moment. Once the act creating the pleasure is over, the pleasure is gone. It’s fleeting.
  • People – whether we realize it or not, many of us turn others into false gods. They can be the rich and famous or those close to us. Neither is healthy and without fail, we will eventually be disappointed and often deeply hurt.

Here’s the truth, all of the above are false gods, bringing us nothing but false happiness. None of them will ever satisfy you on a long-term basis. Each is fleeting.

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

Have you ever heard the story of the old man in the hospital, lamenting to his family while looking back on his life? He wishes that he had spent far less time at work. The clear inference is that if he had it to do over again, he would have been home much more, with those he loved.

The fact is that the only thing that is going to bring us true happiness is our relationships. We are made for community. We are made for friendship. We are made for authentic relationship. Although family and friends are vital, there’s no more important relationship we can have than with Jesus Christ, the source of all Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment.

Suggested Actions
So, what do we do about it? Here’s what I would suggest:

  • Think about the following questions. Take them to prayer. We can only understand an issue if we identify it. Ponder (think/pray) the following:
    • What are the things that you idolize in your life? What do you spend most of your time and money on?
    • Why do you spend your time (and money) this way? Not the surface answer, but truly “why”?
    • Do these things bring you true happiness…peace, joy, and fulfillment?
    • What do you think is missing in your life?
  • Whenever you’re doing whatever you’re doing, always ask yourself “why”? Why are you doing them? Is it going to make you happy long-term, or will it be fleeting?
  • Watch this Friday’s video on this same subject….it will be emailed to you.

Please join us next Wednesday for Week #6 when we talk about Life’s Tragedies. As always, please feel free to get to me with questions, comments, or concerns at [email protected].

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Mark Joseph

 

Week #1 – Being Overwhelmed
Week #2 – Earning the love of others
Week #3 – Lack of self-love
Week #4 – Fear
Week #5 – False gods, False happiness
Week #6 – Life’s Tragedies
Week #7 – Wounds, Resentments

Week #8 – Discovering God’s Love
Week #9 – Forgiveness and healing
Week #10 – Becoming the best Possible You
Week #11 – Path to Peace
Week #12 – Finding your Purpose
Week #13 – You were made for Greatness
Week #14 – True Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment

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Weekly Blog

Week 4# – Fear

This is the 4th of our 14-week program, where we provide Lesson #4, on Fear. So, here are some questions to consider:

  • Separate from your phobias, i.e. snakes, spiders, heights, what are your fears? Examples are right below.
  • What has the impact been on your life? What have these fears prevented you from doing?

Depending on the resources you look to, the list of most common fears can vary. When writing my book, Overwhelming Pursuit: Stop Chasing Your Life and Live, the list that rang most true to me included:

  • Ridicule
  • Rejection
  • Conflict or Confrontation
  • Unknown (Uncertainty)
  • Loneliness

Having recited the above when giving talks, I always ask the audience which of the most prevalent fears is not among the list. Someone invariably answers….FAILURE.
Why are we so fearful of failure?

  • Being rejected
  • Not being liked, being loved
  • Not being good enough
  • Failure itself – what it says about us

Fear impedes progress in our lives. Think about it. Because of fear, you don’t do things or do them differently than you otherwise would. Therefore, the results you achieve, both good and bad, are different than if you didn’t have the fear. Without the fear, your lessons learned, your progress would be different, arguably better.

Photo by Kat Jayne from Pexels 

I have a plaque on my desk that reads, “What would you attempt if you knew you could not fail?” Think about that for a minute. How would your life be different? I know mine would. How about yours’?

The irony here is that our true friends and those in our family who truly love us will support us no matter what. So will God the Father, who loves us unconditionally, and His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, who died for our sins, dare I say our faults and our failings.

It says 365 times in Scripture some derivative of “be not afraid”. God clearly doesn’t want us to live in fear. Yet most of us live with fears, including the list above, and especially (in most cases) the fear of failure. It used to be true in my life. I thank God for the journey He took me on, which will be shared as we move through these lessons.

Suggested Actions

Acknowledging that there are no “quick” fixes to anything in life, I’m going to give you a couple things that helped me with this idea of fear:

I would suggest

  • Think about the following questions. Take them to prayer. We can only understand an issue if we identify it. Ponder (think/pray) the following:
    • Make a list of the top three factors in your life that cause you the most fear.
    • Looking at your list, where do these fears come from? Are they rooted in reality?
    • If not (which is most often the case), what’s the truth in each of these situations?
    • Start to speak that truth in your life, whether that’s through writing something down and sticking it on your bathroom mirror or developing a mantra you can repeat to yourself throughout the day.
  • Sometimes the only way to overcome a fear is by performing the opposite action. Is there a fear you can face down by doing (even if in a very small way) the very thing you’re afraid of? See how you perform…you’ll probably be surprised.
  • During your morning prayer routine this week, offer your fears up to the Lord (discard them, give them to Him), basking in His love and internalizing your true worth. Replace those fears with phrases like “be not afraid” and “I can do all things through Christ”, both from Scripture.
  • Watch this Friday’s video on this same subject….it will be emailed to you.

Please join us next Wednesday for Week #5 when we talk about false gods and false happiness. As always, please feel free to get to me with questions, comments, or concerns at [email protected].

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Mark Joseph

 

Week #1 – Being Overwhelmed
Week #2 – Earning the love of others
Week #3 – Lack of self-love
Week #4 – Fear
Week #5 – False gods, False happiness
Week #6 – Life’s Tragedies
Week #7 – Wounds, Resentments

Week #8 – Discovering God’s Love
Week #9 – Forgiveness and healing
Week #10 – Becoming the best Possible You
Week #11 – Path to Peace
Week #12 – Finding your Purpose
Week #13 – You were made for Greatness
Week #14 – True Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment

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Weekly Blog

Week #3 – Lack of Self-Love

This is the 3rd of our 14-week program, where we provide Lesson #3, Lack of Self-Love. This is a tough issue, which requires honest (and vulnerable) self-assessment. So, here are some questions to consider:

  • After you’ve done something, i.e. an interaction, project, performance (sports, speech, etc.) of some kind, do you find yourself second-guessing yourself?
  • Given the above, do you beat yourself up, which turns into not liking yourself…not loving yourself?
  • What is the impact on your life? During your day? Over the course of your week?

When writing my book, I wanted to vet the concepts with my therapist. I said to her something like, “70-75% of people suffer from lack of self-love”. She scoffed at me, laughing. I’ll never forget it. I said, “what do you mean?” She then said that based on her experience and research, that “lack of self-love afflicts more than 95% of us”.

Think about it in your life…

  • You do something where you believe you’ve not performed well or not met the expectations of others.
  • You believe that they didn’t like what/how you did it (true or not), then inferring that they don’t like you. You become hyper-critical of your actions.
  • It being a constant source of concentration, you beat yourself up, not like yourself, not believing you deserve to be loved, then not loving yourself.

 

Photo by Tim Mossholder from Pexels

If we’re honest, the above resonates.

Same Was True for Me
That was certainly the case for me. Born mostly out of the conditional love (needing to earn the love of others) we talked about last week (Lesson #2), I was beating myself up on a regular basis. According to that same therapist, it was stealing the energy from me to live a happy and fulfilled life.

From the outside, I was this confident guy, who had it all together…nice family, good business, nice things, and I was crumbling inside. It wasn’t just her theory. It was real….I had no peace or joy in my life. I was on that hamster wheel (Lesson #1) and I was exhausted, deflated, frustrated….overwhelmed.

Here’s the Truth About the Situation
Those closest to you, who truly love you, family and friends, could care less how you perform. They’re going to love you anyhow.

No one judges you as harshly as you judge yourself. You, like so many others, hold yourself to unrealistic standards. Yet your worth, your value as a person, has nothing to do with how you perform.

God loves you more than you’ll ever know, no matter what you’ve ever done.

Suggested Actions
So what do we do about it? As indicated, there are no “quick” fixes to anything in life, including LACK OF SELF-LOVE. In future lessons, I’m going to provide guidance on a more comprehensive fix that we can’t get to until covering more material. In the interim, I would suggest:

  • Think about the following questions. Take them to prayer. We can only understand an issue if we identify it. Ponder (think/pray) the following:
    • When was the last time you beat yourself up?
    • Think through what actually occurred in the situation. Looking at it as objectively as you can, how did you perform? Did the job get done? Were the goals primarily met?
    • Understanding that the answers to the above are typically “yes”, how did you allow the circumstance impact you…your day, that evening, even the balance of the week?
    • Imagine what things would have felt like that day or week if you didn’t have this self-doubt.
  • During your morning prayer routine this week:
    • Offer your negative thoughts up to the Lord (discard them, give them to Him), basking in His love and internalizing your true worth. Replace those thoughts with words like “I am loved” and “my value doesn’t lie in what I do”.
    • Try to concentrate on the positive. What are the good things in your life? The occurrences? Relationships? Job? Health? It would help to jot them down.
  • Watch this Friday’s video on this same subject….it will be emailed to you.

Please join us next Wednesday for Week #4 when we talk about FEAR. As always, please feel free to get to me with questions, comments, or concerns at [email protected].

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Mark Joseph

 

Week #1 – Being Overwhelmed
Week #2 – Earning the love of others
Week #3 – Lack of self-love
Week #4 – Fear
Week #5 – False gods, False happiness
Week #6 – Life’s Tragedies
Week #7 – Wounds, Resentments

Week #8 – Discovering God’s Love
Week #9 – Forgiveness and healing
Week #10 – Becoming the best Possible You
Week #11 – Path to Peace
Week #12 – Finding your Purpose
Week #13 – You were made for Greatness
Week #14 – True Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment