Last week, we talked about how conditional love leads to lack of self-love, which then creates a fear within us. This fear prevents us from trying and doing things, using our God given talents, meeting our full potential.
I made a decision in college which was driven by my fear. I loved my economics courses and although doing well in them, I was really good at accounting. More confident of getting a job in the latter, I chose to major in accounting. In hindsight…definitely a result of my fear.
Then there was the time when my company was in pursuit of the proverbial homerun. It was obvious that if we were successful, that it would take us to a much better, bigger place, changing my life professionally and financially. This is where these concepts all tie together. Given the conditional love I experienced, resulting in my lack of self-love, I had this fear of not succeeding that had a grip on me. I wanted it so badly. Although you couldn’t tell from the outside, it paralyzed me from within, causing me to make some bad decisions.
Fear Impedes Our Progress
Fear impedes progress in our lives. Think about it. Because of fear, you don’t do things or do them differently than you otherwise would. Therefore, the results you achieve, both good and bad, are different than if you didn’t have the fear. Without the fear, your lessons learned, your progress would be different, arguably better.
What Are Our Fears?
Separate from your phobias, i.e., snakes, spiders, heights, elevators, what are your fears? Depending on the resources you look to, the list of most common fears can vary. When writing my book, Overwhelming Pursuit: Stop Chasing Your Life and Live, the list that rang most true to me included:
- Ridicule
- Rejection
- Conflict or Confrontation
- Unknown (Uncertainty)
- Loneliness
Reciting the above when giving talks, I always ask the audience which of the most prevalent fears is not among the list. Someone invariably answers….FAILURE.
Why are we so fearful of failure?
- Being rejected
- Not being liked, being loved
- Not being good enough
- Not being liked; not being loved
- Failure itself – what it says about us
I have a plaque on my desk that reads, “What would you attempt if you knew you could not fail?” Think about that for a minute. How would your life be different? I know mine would. How about yours’?
The irony here is that our true friends and those in our family who truly love us will support us no matter what. So will God the Father, who loves us unconditionally, and His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, who died for our sins, dare I say our faults and our failings.
It says 365 times in Scripture some derivative of “be not afraid”. God clearly doesn’t want us to live in fear. Yet most of us live with fears. It used to be true in my life. I thank God for the journey He’s taken me on, which will be shared as we move through this series.
As always, please feel free to contact me at [email protected] with questions, comments, concerns, challenges, or prayer requests.
God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!
God made you for GREATNESS!!!
Mark Joseph