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What is True Friendship?

Cyndi and I often kid around that it’s only the two of us, no one else, whether we’re in Pennsylvania where we live, or Arizona and Nevada, places we like to travel. Like her parents and mine, we do everything together, having very few close friends otherwise. I’m blessed and gratified that my wife is truly my best friend. 

Cyndi often says that I know the world. It’s interesting…many, many places we go, I end up knowing someone or knowing someone who knows someone. I learned a long time ago though, that acquaintances aren’t the same as friendships. I have a ton of acquaintances, but very few close friends. Very few. 

For me, there’s a high bar to the word “friend”. I think of those who meet that criteria as being in my inner circle…those people who invest in me and me in them. It includes those who are heading in the same direction as me, who teach and pray with me, laugh and cry with me, and hold me accountable. They’re there when things are great, as well as when big challenges surface. 

Maybe it’s that high bar that results in me having so few friends. Or maybe I’m just wrong (feel free to respond to this and comment). Maybe the definition should be much broader. One of the problems here is mine. I’m not very good at small talk. If a conversation isn’t substantive, I check out quickly. And for whatever reason (maybe I’m doing it wrong), most conversations don’t get to a place of substance.

 

I’m part of a Discipleship Quad, a faith-based peer group, where 4 brothers in Christ are sharing life. Having been in men’s groups for years, this is my 3rd Quad. I joke around that during my last Quad, those were my 3 best friends and during this Quad, I have a new set of best friends. They’re investing in me and me in them, all of us heading in the same direction (striving to be Disciples of Christ). We laugh and cry, teach and listen, invest, are accountable, and love one another. 

I went to a funeral this past week…the Mother of a high school friend passed away. Playing football together and graduating in 1981, with the exception of maybe 1-2 times, I haven’t seen Nick in 42 years. Yet it was like we didn’t miss a beat…we just picked up where we left off. There are some others who fall into that category for me, including my 3 brothers. 

Life’s crazy busy…and I think getting busier. And as I get older, I’m way more interested in the peace than the pace. I truly don’t have this all figured out. What I have is this yearning, probably not unlike you, for authentic friendship, relationship, and community. I think we’re made for these things. 

I know my most important relationship is with Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. And my close 2nd is Cyndi, who I thank God for. As I close here, I’m reminded of the Great Commandments and Great Commission, where in short Jesus told us to “love God, love our neighbors, and share the Gospel message”. Maybe if I just do more of that, I’ll have more friends, good friends, real friends. How about you? 

As always, please email me at Mark@MarkJosephMinistries.com with questions, concerns, comments, or prayer requests. 

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Remember…God made you for Greatness!!!

Mark Joseph

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Weekly Blog

One of Satan’s Primary Strategies

C.S. Lewis writes in The Screwtape Letters of Satan’s strategies to lure us away from God. From his work, other places, and our own experiences, we know that Satan uses division, fear, self-pity, pride, greed, lust, and discouragement, to name a few. If we’re truthful, we’ve all experienced these things. There’s an additional strategy of Satan’s that I just experienced recently…that is busyness. Working in the Conference Office at Franciscan University of Steubenville, it’s going to be an incredibly busy summer. This summer we are anticipating 16 youth conferences and 5 adult conferences.

Too Busy to Pray

Although gratifying, given the many blessings of the weekend experiences for the teens and adults, it is exhausting. And given how incredibly busy I (we) are, my prayer life diminishes.

Photo by Tomas Ryant

Prayer is a Struggle

I don’t know anyone on this journey who doesn’t struggle with prayer. Although the same is true for me, every day I get in my rote prayers, in addition to spending some quiet time with Jesus. ( didn’t get any prayer time in, but I didn’t even think about it until on the flight back home.)
 
The most important relationship I have is with Jesus and it gets massively interrupted given the busyness of my life. Satan wins that battle some days.
 
For the longest time, my life was about the pace….when I was praying to the god of money. Now, it’s all about the peace. I’m not interested in running from one thing to another, always chasing what’s next and being exhausted. I want peace and balance in my life.

What Prayer Does for Me

I pray to show God gratitude and to adore Him, but I also pray for what it does for me. It’s been a very positive thing in my life. Although not perfect at it, I do it daily. Continuing to struggle with it, it is always a meaningful part of my day. Prayer helps me be my best.

How busy are you? What are you busy doing? What is your busyness keeping you from? As indicated above, Satan uses division, fear, self-pity, pride, greed, lust, and discouragement. He also uses busyness to distract us from the most important thing in our lives…God the Father and His Son, Jesus Christ.

You can’t address a problem unless you know it exists. Know of the above and try to slow things down. Spend time with God and live in a place of peace, which is way better than the pace so many of us are so used to.

As always, please get to me with questions or comments at Mark@MarkJosephMinistries.com.

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Mark Joseph

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Weekly Blog

You Can’t Make This Stuff Up

Over the last several years, I’ve come to understand that everything happens for a reason, that there are no coincidences in this world. Since having my eyes opened to this, I’ve seen it over and over in my life and the lives of others. Here’s an example. 

On April 25, 2012, I was driving up the interstate to talk to my therapist (yes, I was in therapy for several years given the tragedy I had experienced) about marrying career and ministry. Having experienced conversion 6 years earlier and growing in my faith year after year, it was something seriously on my heart. While driving, I received an email from Mark Nehrbas, my eventual predecessor at Franciscan University of Steubenville. I had met Mark as part of Catholic Men’s Fellowship of Pittsburgh. 

I pulled over to read the email, then asking Mark to call me. I couldn’t believe what I was reading. Moving to another position at the University, Mark was advising his network of the vacancy from his old job…one that matched up to my interests and skill set. When we spoke, he advised me that it was the Feast Day of St. Mark. So it was Mark talking to Mark on the Feast Day of St. Mark, when Mark was on his way to see his therapist about ministry and career. You can’t make this stuff up. 

Knowing the Joy of Christ 

A week ago Monday, I attended Mark Nehrbas’ funeral. After battling cancer for more than 9 years, Mark died at age 71. Although way too young, it was truly a celebration of his life. The Church was packed…not a spare seat. The Liturgy was beautiful, apparently planned in its entirety by Mark. His 9 children, their spouses, and their kids were a joy to see, as was his wife, Carol…all a testament to Mark’s commitment to faith and family.  

During his homily/eulogy, Fr. Tim Shannon indicated that Mark was baptized in the Spirit 52 years ago. Moving to Steubenville over 30 years ago for the Charismatic Renewal, Mark was an active member of the Community of God’s Love. Passionate about sharing the love of Christ and the joy of living life in the Holy Spirit, Mark was a presence in the community and nationally through his work at the University. Always evangelizing, always full of joy, and always smiling. While Mark will be missed, his legacy is significant, centered on his family, second only to Jesus Christ and His Holy Spirit. 

I thank God for Mark, not only for his witness and example, not just for all the work he did at the University as my predecessor…but also because of the impact he had on my journey. Had Mark not sent that email on April 25, 2012, I wouldn’t be at Franciscan University. Had we not talked that day and he so encouraged me, I may not have applied for the job that I’ve had now for 10 years. 

Mark talking to Mark on the Feast Day of St. Mark, when Mark was on his way to talk to his therapist about career and ministry. You can’t make this stuff up. No coincidences, no mistakes.  Everything happens for a reason, all as per God’s grand plan. Thank you, Mark!! Praise God!!!

Please see this video for an interview Mark gave not long ago on suffering. 

As always, please email me at Mark@MarkJosephMinistries.com with questions, concerns, comments, or prayer requests. 

God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Remember…God made you for Greatness!!!

Mark Joseph

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Weekly Blog

How to Achieve Peace

Do you experience peace on a regular basis? Or instead are you overwhelmed by what’s going on in your life? Does the busyness nullify your opportunity for any downtime, let alone peace of mind? Does the pace crowd out the peace? If you’re answer is “yes” to any or all of the above, be assured that you’re not alone.

For the longest time, I had no peace in my life. I was totally overwhelmed by life, trying to build a business, raise a family, coach our kids in their sports, stay in shape, do chores around the house, have a social life, etc. I prided myself in how much I got done, or thought I got done. What I wasn’t achieving was peace in my life. Likewise, I wasn’t experiencing joy, nor was I fulfilled in what I was doing.

Overtime, I’ve come to believe that there’s a distinct path to peace, which includes surrender, gratitude, humility, and love.

Photo by Ricardo Esquivel from Pexels

Surrender
Acknowledging that I don’t truly have control over anything in my life, coupled with God loving me unconditionally, making me uniquely with special gifts, and wanting me to be fulfilled, I now surrender all to Him.

Doing so means trying to abide by God’s will (He knows best for me) and doing my best, while leaving the results to Him. Knowing His love for me negates my need for validation from others. He and I are in this together and He has my back.

Gratitude
Be thankful. More than that, believe that everything happens for a reason, that there are no coincidences in life. It’s true. Everything is part of God’s grand plan. So live in a place of gratitude; be grateful for everything that happens, even the crises in your life.

Gratitude isn’t just good for the soul, it’s good for the body too. Experts are constantly talking about the benefits to living a life of gratitude, including being happier, healthier, more optimistic, more spiritual, a better friend, a better boss, and many other good outcomes. A true attitude of gratitude is one that allows us to see the hand of God in all things and trust that everything will turn out for the best.

Humility
To me, humility is the opposite of ego, which is our false self, the identity that we create that is often very far from the truth of who we are. The truly humble person lives from the truth of who he is, strengths and weaknesses.

A humble person is genuinely happy for others in their successes. He is accepting of others’ ideas and thoughts (accepting doesn’t mean always agreeing), always very willing to engage in dialogue. The humble person doesn’t always have to be right, be in control, or even win. Humility allows us to accept others for who they are, rather than judging them or trying to change them.

Being humble is understanding that it is only in God working through us that we can perform or achieve anything worthwhile. It is His doing, not ours.

Photo by Orlando Allo

Love
Above all else, we are called to love. Jesus tells us to love our neighbors as ourselves, second only to loving God with our whole heart, mind, strength, and soul. We need to love. When we fail to love, we leave those around us empty, and we are empty too.

Without relationships, life is meaningless. True relationship is impossible without love. To love, we need to be vulnerable; we need to trust; we need to care. Like Jesus, we need to love all.

Please share your comments, challenges, or concerns with me at Mark@MarkJosephMinistries.com.

May God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Mark Joseph