On July 29^th, 3 were killed and 16 wounded at the Gilroy (California) Garlic Festival. On August 3^rd, 20 were killed and 26 wounded at a Wal-Mart in El Paso, TX. Then just 13 hours later, 9 were killed and 27 wounded at a popular downtown area in Dayton, OH. Add to that other active shootings of the past months and years, in addition to what takes place in our biggest cities like Chicago, on a regular basis.

So the question is “why”.

Some want to point to guns and others mental health issues or current public discourse. Given our current political climate, I’m not confident that our politicians will do anything to positively impact the issue. And how about this…even if it were the best of political climates, would what they do really address the core problem?

The Impact of Religion

As religion, spirituality, and attending Church decline in our society, we lose our moral compass. We become desensitized to so many things, including the value of life. Here are some facts:

Pew Research Center finds that the percentage of adults (ages 18 and older) who describe themselves as Christians has dropped by nearly eight percentage points in just seven years, from 78.4% in 2007 to 70.6% in 2014. Over the same period, the percentage of Americans who are religiously unaffiliated (atheist, agnostic or “nothing in particular”) has jumped more than six points, from 16.1% to 22.8%. You can get more info here.
Gallup indicates that U.S. church membership was 70% or higher from 1937 through 1976, falling modestly to an average of 68% in the 1970s through the 1990s. The past 20 years have seen an acceleration in the drop-off, with a 20-percentage-point decline since 1999 and more than half of that change occurring since the start of the current decade.
In 2014, the FBI released a study showing that “active shooting incidents” had increased at an average annual rate of 16 percent between 2000 and 2013 (Blair and Schweit, 2014). Blair and Schweit found that active shootings had increased from only one incident in 2000 to 17 in 2013.

Notice the correlation above between active (mass) shootings and a decline in religion, spirituality, and church membership.

Other Potential Reasons

Some would blame Justice Hugo Black and the Supreme Court for their ruling in Everson v. Board of Education(1947), where they had an interpretation of “a wall of separation between church and state” which was much different than that of Thomas Jefferson. Although just one ruling, the impact has been devastating to those of us of faith.

With a little looking, you can find articles or research that point to societal issues, like “Individualism” rather than laws or government. In the same article, the researcher points to kids not going to church because their parents don’t go to church.

Here’s the Point

Without God, without our faith, we lose our way. To understand what the fruits and gifts of the Holy Spirit are, or what the seven Christian virtues include, is to want them for ourselves and for our children. But more and more of society is turning its back on the only institution that teaches them.

I saw a recent post that said, “Dear God, why do you allow so much violence in our schools?”, signed Concerned Student. The same post had the following reply, “Dear Concerned Student, I’m not allowed in schools”, signed God.

Jesus Brings Meaning to Our Lives

More important than the institution is Jesus Christ, our Savior. As many of us know, it’s only being in relationship with Him, understanding our identity as children of God, that life is meaningful. In fact, if you’re a reader of my blogs, you know that:

God made each of us with special gifts and talents
In His image, as part of His grand plan, individually and as part of all of humanity
He put you on this earth for a specific purpose
God made you for Greatness!!!

So…what to do. Here’s what I think. Pray for the victims. Pray for our society. And share the love of Christ with as many as possible…one soul at a time.

As always, feel free to contact me with questions or comments at Mark@MarkJosephMinistries.com.

May God Bless you on your Path to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!

Mark Joseph

Relationships Can Be Tough

I don’t know about you, but the closer I am to someone, the more challenging the relationship can be. I’m not talking about the good times. They’re easy for everyone. I’m referring to times of conflict or potential disagreement, where you don’t believe the other person is considering or has made the right decision.

My theory is that we fear the risk of loss. We care for and depend on those closest to us, whether family or friends. We don’t want to hurt them. We don’t want to create disagreement or conflict because we don’t want to lose them. So out of fear of saying something wrong, we don’t say anything, or we don’t convey our true feelings, or what we say comes across the wrong way.

This has certainly been true in my life, whether it be with my brothers, close friends, our kids, and even my wife. If I’m truthful, I’ve not communicated what or how I should many times in my life. Because of expectations that are most often unspoken, things don’t always come out the right way. Because of the closeness, assumptions are made and feelings are easily hurt. There’s a tension that doesn’t exist when folks aren’t so close.

Things are Different When Relationships are More Distant

I’ve been working within organizations for 33 years. Over that period of time, I’ve experienced plenty of issues that require resolution. Ironically, most never really reach the level of conflict, which I attribute to addressing them proactively and professionally.

I often say that if I were the husband and father that I am the business manager and coach, my family would be a lot better off. That statement stems from my approach in those roles and has proved to really help me not only in the work world, but at home. What I’ve learned is:

Don’t assume malice; instead understand that the other person has the best intentions and as such, isn’t trying to hurt you, others, or themselves
Let them know how much you care early in the conversation
Share with them your discomfort with the discussion. Related to this one and #2 above, you might say something like, “I care for you more than you know. I don’t want to hurt you, nor risk losing you. As a result, I’m nervous about the conversation I think we need to have. I really hope I can convey what I’m thinking with you understanding my heart”. Obviously make this your own.
Don’t make assumptions. You wouldn’t with a stranger or coworker. You shouldn’t with someone close to you. You’ve probably heard, “to assume is to make an ass out of you (u) and me”.
You can say anything as long as you say it softly. Although not absolutely true, it is pretty true. Tone is so important. Sharing is always better than telling and way better than scolding. Yelling is obviously unacceptable and unproductive.
Truly listen for understanding. Don’t be so invested in JUST getting your points across, but listen to understand the other person and his/her struggles, objectives, and ideas.
Don’t be overly invested in the outcome. We all have our own lives to live. We need to make decisions for ourselves, while others need to make their own decisions. We can try to charitably influence, but we shouldn’t own the outcome. We can’t be relying on others for our own peace and joy (topics for many future blogs)

Interestingly, at work I see it as my mission to help people solve their own problems. I help by asking questions as opposed to imposing my view, whereas I want to solve the problems of those closest to me. Or more specifically, I want them to solve their problems the way I want them solved. You see the distinction? The problem? The preferred way? I have, which is why I try to follow 1-7 today.

I sincerely hope the above helps you. I know that these things have helped me over the years. Please share your thoughts with me via email at mark@markjosephministries.com.

May God Bless you on your journey to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!