In last week’s blog, I proposed that the biggest fear people have is the fear of failure. Based on the feedback I received, it appears that message resonated with many. What is it about failure that most concerns us? Is it…
- Being rejected
- Not being loved
- Not being good enough
- Failure itself – what it says about us
The irony is that your real friends and those in your family who truly love you will always support you. They don’t care whether you succeed or fail. They love you unconditionally, no matter what your imperfections… and we all have them. They only want the very best for you and are always there for you.
Why the Fear
So, why the fear? My experience is that we grow up believing that we have to earn the love of others and do so by trying to excel at what we do. Over time, we get trapped into believing that our “who” is our “do”, that our role is our identity. In other words, we believe our worth is in our performance, prominence, possessions, and personal relationships. Most people believe they have to “do” to be loved.
I’m convinced that believing that we have to earn love creates in us a lack of self-love. We fear that if we don’t perform we won’t be loved. And at a very fundamental level, we all want to be loved; we all want to be accepted.
What Would You Attempt if You Knew You Couldn’t Fail?
I have a plaque on my desk that reads, “What would you attempt if you knew you couldn’t fail?” Think about that question. Pause and ponder it in your mind, “What would you attempt if you knew you could not fail?”
- How would your life be different? (I know mine would be)
- What would you try?
- What would you be?
- How would the world be different if everyone lived this way?
If your biggest fear is failure (like most), it only makes sense that you would try more things and do them differently if “you knew you couldn’t fail”. You would exhibit more courage. You may possibly think differently about what direction you would go in. You wouldn’t be so tense or nervous when trying a new endeavor.
What Would You Attempt if You Knew Nobody Would Feel any Differently about You if You Failed?
So, what would your outlook be on trying new things if you knew that nobody cared whether you succeeded or failed; that it would make no difference as to how they thought about you?
Again, those who truly love you will never leave you. They’ll always love you for your “who”, not your “do”. And God our Father never sees you as a failure, nor does His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, who died on the cross for our sins, dare I say our faults and our failings.
You Can Do Something About It
TRY, RISK, DARE, and DO all that you feel called to. Who cares what happens…those who love you don’t. God loves you regardless. And nobody else matters.
How do you feel about the above? Please share your thoughts with me at [email protected].
May God Bless you on your journey to Peace, Joy, and Fulfillment!!!